100 Things I Want To Teach My Daughter #90
#90- If he makes you cry anything but happy tears, he’s not worth it~
Don’t mistaken these words of wisdom as to hold out for prince charming…he’s gonna be perfect.
You know there is NO such thing as Prince Charming. But what I do want you to know is any guy who makes you cry because he is hurting you in anyway…he isn’t worth it!
I don’t mean you need to be hard on him, there will be those nights in your life when nothing but a tub of ice cream can make you feel better. Trust me girl, men can be clueless. Sometimes they have no idea what’s going on with a woman and worse they have no idea how to make it better.
He will say stupid things, he’ll do ridiculous things, more than likely he’ll look at another girl at the wrong time leaving you in a whirlwind spell of insane emotional turmoil. Men don’t think like we do, but the good ones will at least try. He’ll never be perfect but neither will you.
If there is something he does or says that leaves you welling up with sad or angry tears, before you throw him to the hounds of hell always check yourself first. Figure out what might really be making you emotional, if there may be an overreacting emoticon going off in your mind. Put that away for a bit, use your words and your indoor voice.
My most valuable piece of advice for this topic is simple.
When you cry because of something that may be due to your man, pay attention to how he tries to fix it*
I don’t want you ever going into a relationship with someone believing he is a bad boyfriend if he makes you cry. He is only a bad boyfriend if it happens repeatedly and if he doesn’t take the time to help repair the damage. If you find yourself in tears more than you are laughing…then get out of that relationship. Promise me you will not spend another day with someone who doesn’t make it his life long goal to see you happy, to make you smile.
Going back to the occasional sad tears, don’t make him pay for it forever. If he handles it accordingly and adjusts this situation so you both feel better..then immediately let it go.
Another thing I want you to remember is too always talk it out, be sure to express your feelings and listen to his. If you find your guy struggling with what to do, tell him what you need. It took me a few years to get this one right.
Men are NOT mind readers, they also for the most part cannot read clues or play head games with emotions. You need to be factual and real, they need to be told directly what you need or want.
Don’t play games with him, you’ll get nowhere~
If you hold up your end of the deal in a relationship and your significant other isn’t….don’t waste another moment with him. Promise mommy you’ll get out.
I’m not saying to necessarily give up, always give it your all especially if you have a real love for him. But remember it takes two, he has to sacrifice and give his all as well. If you find your feelings are being played with, LEAVE.
Any man willing to stay up all night until you feel better, is in my books a keeper. With that said, be fair. He is human, he will make mistakes and you owe it too him to understand that.
But always remember…
Fool me once shame on you, Fool me twice shame on me~